After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
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