soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Everclear isn't food dammit
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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