bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
