The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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