the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
its not stalking. its research.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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