All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize