i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
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BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
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I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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