this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
