How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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