I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
This is my gift to your gina
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
