if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i would punch a child for taco bell
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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