Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
