So drunk its hurt
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
You dont lie about slip and slides
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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