HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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