hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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