38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
