at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
well most of my day revolves around power hour
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
