Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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