being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
