I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He? As in you personified your dick?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
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