Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
me + whiskey = a bad person
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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