I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
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