It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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