I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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