You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize