Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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