Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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