I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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