I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
