so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
