Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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