I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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