i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
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