How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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