Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
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