So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Randomize
