I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
