Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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