You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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