Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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