just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
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