fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
You can't special order awesome
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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