Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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