Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
