Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
