i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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