I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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