so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
