Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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