It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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