So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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